The news about Jared Fogle and Josh Duggar has hit me hard.....

America, wake up! There is an attack against you, your career, your family, your future, and it usually starts online. The availability of sexual material coming from the privacy of one’s desktop, laptop, notebook, or smartphone is destroying marriages, careers, and entire lives.  STOP IT. STOP NOW.

I know, you think it doesn’t hurt anyone. “What’s the problem with viewing a little porn,” you say.  

“It’s just soft porn anyway.”

“ I don’t look at the hard stuff.”

            “Everybody does it.”

            “It’s normal.”

            “I can satisfy myself and not involve my spouse.”

            “My sexual enjoyment is my business. I’ll do whatever pleases me.”

            “Nobody will ever know.”

            “Nobody will get hurt.”

“Nobody will get hurt?” Ask the families of Jared Fogle and Josh Duggar about that.

           

Sexual sin and abhorrent behavior has filled my newsfeed this week, and it has hit me in the gut. Facebook is filled with memes ridiculing Jared Fogle and lengthy posts from Christian sites decrying the hypocrisy of Joshua Duggar.

Fogle engaged in child porn and is accused of paying for sex with underage girls. He will likely spend at least five years in prison. At this point, Duggar has not been charged with any illegal activity, although he was accused of molesting five girls when he was a teenager. Had it come to light sooner or had it been handled differently, he would likely be looking at prison time as well.

Both of these men had wives and children. They had good careers. They had some fame. Their lives have now been destroyed. Jared, in particular, will be a registered sex offender for the rest of his life. It is likely that his wife, who filed for divorce on Wednesday, will end up with all their assets. He will go to prison for at least 5 years, probably more. When he is finally released, He will have nothing. The label on him will make it difficult for him to find work, housing, and even attend a church. No one wants a registered sex offender in his neighborhood, office, or church.

Why did he risk LOSING EVERYTHING? EVERYTHING……

The answer is, of course, because he was addicted. Addiction (to anything) includes compulsive, dangerous behavior. The addict will risk anything and everything for the next “fix,” whether it is alcohol, drugs, or sex. That’s what happened to Jared Fogle and Joshua Duggar, and the man I was married to for thirty years.

            “That’s not me,” you say.

            Okay then. STOP. NOW.

Whether you want to admit it or not, viewing porn online is too easy, terribly common, and it is a gateway to sexual addiction.

 “Not everyone who looks at a nude image is going to become a sex addict. But the constant exposure is going to trigger people who are susceptible,” says Dr. David Sack, chief executive of Los Angeles’s Promises Treatment Centers. (“The Sex Addiction Epidemic” Newsweek Magazine, November 25, 2011)

It’s time for the church to get its head out of the sand and deal with this issue.

A survey done by ChristiaNet gives these statistics:

• 50% of Christian men are addicted to pornography
• 20% of Christian women are addicted to pornography
• 60% of Christian women admitted to having a significant struggles with lust

I get it. Who wants to preach about this? It makes people squirm. It makes me squirm! I don’t want to talk about it or write about it, but ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

I can understand that pastors don’t want to preach about pornography in the main pulpit, but how about dealing with it at the men’s meetings and the women’s meetings? What about the youth?

•          The average age someone begins viewing porn is 11 years old!
•           A study in the southeastern U.S. found that 53 percent of boys and 28 percent of girls (ages 12-15) reported use of sexually explicit media online.

Too many lives have been completely destroyed by sexual addiction. Stop it before it starts! Sexual addiction is not just about sex, and it may have its origin in other behaviors such as abuse, but the much larger and more common risk factor is pornography. (American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy)

I am no expert on sexual addiction, but I have lived with the consequences of it. Here are some things I hope you will do to protect your family and your future:

1. Be honest with yourself.

2. Be honest with someone else. If you are married, that should be your spouse.

3. Talk about this. Explain to the teenagers how viewing porn will affect their marriage and how it can open the door to addiction.

4. Don’t live isolated. Get involved in a church community. That doesn’t mean just show up for services. Men need male friends. Women need female friends.

5. Keep the computer in a public space in your house. Every adult should have access to all computers, tablets, and smart phones.

6. Check the viewing history daily.

7. Keep your eyes on your future. The full gratification of a sexual experience (I’m trying to be delicate in my use of words here) lasts less than a minute. Decide to not let that minute destroy the rest of your life.

I pray that this post will make a difference in someone's life. I'll blog you later, and it will probably be more positive and joy-filled! Until then....do something today to fulfill your purpose!

The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me. Your love, O Lord endures forever. Do not abandon the work of Your hands. (Psalm 138:8)