My Odd Life-Waiting at the airport for your ship to come in? Love at First Write...

Today....

The blog you've been waiting for....well, at least someone is waiting for it....

One of my dear readers messaged me after last week's blog asking what the Amazing Mr. Brintnall wrote in his first email to me that got my attention.... Would you like to know?

Hmmmmmm...........Should I tell you?  Really, this is pretty personal stuff......

I am sharing some pretty intimate things.....because I have rarely (if ever) heard anyone else talk about this......... I believe there is a lesson here....for singles, yes...but if you're married, please read on....this will encourage you and add some FIRE to your marriage....I promise!

First, I want to express my empathy (not sympathy, mind you) for singles who want to be married.........and have been waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting and waiting....ad infinitum.......I know what it feels like to hear married people, (who will get in bed with their spouse tonight) tell you what a "wonderful thing it is to be single....you can do whatever you want to do"...except put together furniture from IKEA.....because that ALWAYS takes two people! :-)  

I understood that they were trying to encourage us single folk....and there were some things I LOVED about being single....
I ENJOYED eating nothing but salad every night for dinner....(men don't normally go for that-the Amazing Mr. Brintnall has made that clear!).....
I LOVED the fact that laundry was easy....the house stayed clean....AND there weren't hairs all over my bathroom.....
I NEVER had any disagreements about how I spent my money!!!!!

I wasn't DESPERATE to be married, but I knew (and my pastor had confirmed it) that I was not meant to be single for the rest of my life.....and since I am not in my 20s or 30s, that meant I would not be waiting 20 or 30 years.....

Don't get me wrong....Don't rush into a relationship....especially if you are looking for a person to "make you happy."  I was happy and complete as an individual.  I laughed.  I had friends. I served God. I had a great job/ministry.........I just couldn't put IKEA furniture together......and that was such a bummer! :-) 

Seriously, though.....It's ALWAYS better to wait AS LONG AS IT TAKES..... than to run into the wrong relationship!  YIKES!  Don't do THAT!!!  Never get desperate and "settle for"!   

But....some people are waiting at the airport for their ship to come in........uhhhh....  Ships don't come in at the airport.....

Others are professional "tire kickers" when it comes to relationships.......
They determine the possible future in a relationship by focusing on the tires, the rims, and the shiny chrome....if the tires are a little worn down and the chrome has lost its luster, they write "that one" off.......but there are only so many Denzel Washingtons and George Clooneys out there.....

If you haven't read last week's blog, you should....it is about following your heart without disconnecting your brain....and how I left the airport and went to the harbor where ships come in.....As a disclaimer, I want to say that everyone's ship won't come in at the same harbor....your harbor may be different than mine.....you need to listen to Holy Spirit, get wise counsel, and use wisdom (as mentioned in last week's blog!) Still, you've got to get to your harbor to meet your ship-it may be another city, state, volunteer association, etc........God will lead you!  
(That will preach.....but I digress.....)

The harbor into which my ship sailed was an online Christian dating website.  I had resisted going that route because it was so......so.......well, you know.....

What I learned about meeting someone online can help you regardless of where you meet, or what stage your relationship is in....even if you are already married!

Now about kicking those tires..... I've heard about "those lists" some single women have....the requirements to be "spouse material"......
1. Height between  6' and 6'4"
2. Muscular build
3. Must have hair.....but on head only.......back hair excludes one from contention
4. Teeth must be as white and straight as chiclets.....
5. Must make at least $100,000/year and drive a status-mobile, but not be overly devoted to work....
6.  Wardrobe must be GQ worthy...designer shoes, suits, AND jeans only....
7. Must pray like the Apostle Paul, talk like their pastor, and walk on water...like Jesus!  :-)

I honestly haven't spoken to too many single men about their lists.....but I am sure they have some similar items on their lists.....

Chalk it up to my age, experience, or plain old common sense, here's what was on my list...

1. Must be a serious Christian.
2. Must be filled with Holy Spirit.
3. Must be gainfully employed.
4. Must make more money than I.
5. Must be financially responsible.

There were unwritten things on my list....for example....I needed to find him interesting...duh...and we had to have complimentary political views...because.....I can get pretty fired up about those things....and.....yea...that could be messy.....

The vehicle of an online introduction allowed me to focus on those important things....I didn't know what kind of car he drove, or whether his clothes were from Neiman Marcus or the local farm supply store (it turned out to be the latter....)....and the hair thing.....well....never mind!  :-) He met all my qualifications.......I learned about his character, his walk with the Lord, and what he really valued.  I found out he had a good vocabulary, was an excellent writer....and he knew how to use a semi-colon properly!  (I think the proper punctuation is what really won me over!)

We expressed ourselves more completely and honestly than we would have if we had met in the grocery store and gone to dinner several times.

I still have most of our correspondence....the Amazing Mr. Brintnall printed the emails he could recover and put them in a binder for me....as I read them today, my heart still goes "pitter-patter."

Married folk....if you want to FIRE UP your marriage, start WRITING TO ONE ANOTHER!  Share your heart with your spouse in writing.... use email....or Facebook messaging .......texts......or old fashioned paper and pen.......write about your core values, how God is speaking to you, what first attracted you to your spouse, experiences that have taught you important lessons in life, your family background, your hopes and dreams for the future....and always include words of affirmation and love for your husband/wife.

Keep a journal of precious moments together....the day you got married, the birth of your children, the struggles and the victories you've shared, changes, adjustments, joys, sadness, celebrations, and the importance of being together through it all.....

Write them down....and read them often....
It will remind you of the precious love and relationship you have!  It will make your heart go "pitter patter"!  :-)

So....what was in that first email that got my attention?  Nothing much, really....but I could tell he had a sense of humor, was intelligent, confident in who he was; he thought I was beautiful (from my photo), and he knew what was really important in life.

We lost that introductory email, but I still remember it...verbatim...(To understand this email, you should know that on my profile I wrote that I would consider someone a little younger than I because I was "younger than my birth certificate.")

"OK, so you're gorgeous, articulate, and focused on all the good stuff. What the heck are you doing on here? Oh, and by the way, I may be outside of the age range you're looking for, but you aren't the only one who is "younger than your birth certificate!" With all that out of the way, how ya doing today?" 

And so it began.....as I mentioned last week...I followed my heart, but I didn't disconnect my brain.....It truly was love at first write.....

BE ENCOURAGED.....whether you are married or single....male or female....
God's got good things for you....let Him direct you to your harbor.  Your ship will come in....whether your ship is a spouse or a business deal or a ministry opportunity! But you can't be waiting in the wrong place!

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight."  Proverbs 3:5-6

If you got something out of this blog, please share it!  I would love to hear from you!

I'll blog you next week; until then....
Write something........and do something today to fulfill your purpose!

Follow Your Heart, but Don't Disconnect Your Brain- How I Met the Amazing Mr. Brintnall- Part 2

Today....

I want to encourage you to follow your heart...but don't disconnect your brain....

What is on your heart that you've held back because it was new or different?

Inventions? Business ideas? Investments? 

Getting that College Degree?  A Relationship? 



Is there anything in your heart to do that you haven't done because people of/in your
______________________________ (fill in the blank- sex, marital status, socio-economic group, age group, race, church, job, educational level, city, state, country, etc....) don't normally do it that way?

My life in the ministry is rather public...... I'm not as famous Joyce Meyer....my life isn't on the huge jumbo-tron screen like someone of her renown.....but it is still public....

That's part of "the deal" of being in the ministry....The Apostle Paul told the Christians in Philippi, "Dear brothers and sisters, pattern your lives after mine, and learn from those who follow our example." (Philippians 3:17) 

Pattern your lives after mine.....WHEW!  That's a pretty big responsibility! Ministry is more than a 9-5 job.  You are never really "off." My life (and any minister's life) is constantly on display as an example..... 

I've heard people in the ministry bemoan the fact that they live in a "fishbowl," but that is part of the deal!  If you can't handle it, do something else!  

Seriously....if you don't like working with pipes, don't be a plumber....if you don't like working with numbers, accounting is not a good career choice....and if you can't handle life in the fishbowl.....DO NOT.... I REPEAT......DO NOT...... go into the ministry......

While it is part of "the deal"......the problem with the fishbowl is that it can box you into what "they" think.  
You know, "It's ALWAYS been done this way before...." 

"What will they think if I do this differently?"

"That's not the way so-and-so did it." 

PKs (preacher's kids) often leave the church because of the fishbowl life....

I always told my kids we were SUPPOSED to live like CHRISTIANS......being in the ministry had NOTHING to do with it!

YES....ALL THE TIME...live like the Bible says......if we did that, we didn't have to worry about the fishbowl......

THE FISHBOWL DIDN'T HAVE TO LIMIT THEIR CREATIVITY, ABILITIES, or PURSUITS. 
And if you know my kids, you know it didn't.....

Fishbowl or not, we had limiting factors to what we could. Here are my standards that would limit what we could do as serious Christians-

• IS THIS CONTRARY TO GOD'S WORD?  
• IS IT LED BY HOLY SPIRIT?
• IS NOW THE TIME?

You're probably wondering how this fits into the tale of How I Met the Amazing Mr. Brintnall.....

When I became suddenly single, there was a time of healing that was necessary. (That's for another blog.....) 

Eventually I was ready to consider being married again....but how could a suitable husband ever find me? Here are the ways I expected....because that's they way "everybody" else that I knew had done it......

He could join my church....but that would be awkward to say the least, since I was in a major position of leadership on staff there.....

He could notice me sitting alone at a restaurant, see me bow my head to pray, then approach me politely and begin a conversation. He would ask for my phone number, we would talk, then go out to dinner. He would join my church, and off we would go....I must not have been praying long enough or loud enough over my meals.....cause that never happened....

He could find me through a mutual acquaintance....except.....everybody I knew was married with married friends....it wasn't happening that way.....

Not only did those preconceived notions affect me, but I had to consider how my decisions would affect other people. What kind of example was I setting? Would others be tempted to do something dangerous or immoral by justifying their behavior on something I did?  

I had heard about couples meeting on the internet....but I had also heard from some preachers that "Christian women don't do that." Even though I had considered it, I listened to those voices that said, "We don't do things that way." 

One woman (who also lived in the fishbowl) asked me if I had considered using a Christian "dating" site to meet someone.  I had thought about it. The questions I had to answer were, "Would using a Christian dating site be contrary to any of my life's limiting factors?" 
"Would going online to meet my mate set a bad example?" 

• Was using a Christian "dating" site contrary to the Word of God?
• Here are the arguments against it-
• If a female goes on a website, then the woman is finding the man, and scripture says the man is to find the woman. (Prov. 18:22)
• It could be dangerous....you watch the news, right?
• People don't always tell the truth online. You may not be getting what you think you're getting
• After much prayer and thought, I came to these conclusions regarding those arguments-
• Putting my picture and background information on a website didn't mean I was "going after the man." A Christian dating site is nothing more than an intermediary of introduction....There is a scriptural basis for this... an intermediary found Isaac his wife....(Genesis 24)
• 
  
• It didn't have to be dangerous....I had plans of how I would meet a man in person for the first few times....never alone! If it looked like the friendship could get serious, I would have him interview with some trusted friends before we got into "courting"...besides....I'm always prepared when it comes to personal safety....'nuff said....
• 
  
• People don't always tell the truth online....have you heard the old song, "Online"?  It's not a Christian song....but it's pretty funny.... here are some of the lyrics............. Online I live in Malibu, I pose for Calvin Klein, I've been in GQ; I'm single and I'm rich, and I've got a set of six packs that would blow your mind. I'm so much cooler online.  Yeah, I'm so much cooler online...............................  I was fully aware that I could be lied to....but I could be lied to if I met the man at church as well....I knew that if I got into a relationship, I would need to meet the man's pastor and his family. I would need to know if he had a pastor to whom he was accountable. The character of his family and his friends would reveal a lot about his character.  If his best character reference was a beer drinking member of the bowling team...... I would be concerned.....(no offense to bowlers...)
• Was it led by Holy Spirit?
• For me, at this time.....Yes....I can't answer that for anyone else at any other time. 
• I know how He leads me....I had a knowing....that's the best way I can describe it.  
• One night, after some time in prayer, I had a sense that it was time to take that step. I did a search on my iPad for "Christian Dating Sites."  Three popped up. I had heard of two of them, the third one was unknown to me.  I went to that website. It had links to "Focus on the Family."  I later found out that the site screens every picture that is put up and it is the only one of the three that is owned by Christians. 
• Is now the time?
• I knew it was. I had gotten things in order, lived a celibate life since being single, and had been serving God faithfully.
• I knew in my heart it was the right thing to do at the right time.......regardless of what arguments fishbowl observers might have against it.

I believe the parameters I set and the way I handled it did not set a bad example. I was cautious, I had rules for if/when I met a man online....... and I stuck by them.....(maybe on another blog....)

MY HEART SAID, "DO IT."  

I FOLLOWED MY HEART BUT I DID NOT DISCONNECT MY BRAIN AND ACT FOOLISHLY OR DANGEROUSLY!

What about you?

Are there arguments that are keeping you from doing what's on your heart? 

Do you have fishbowl observers who are telling you, "You'd better be careful!" 

"You shouldn't do that."

 "That's not the way we do it" ?

If it's not contrary to God's Word, if it is Holy Spirit led, and if now is the time.....

GO FOR IT----FOLLOW YOUR HEART, BUT DON'T DISCONNECT YOUR BRAIN!

• Get good information
• Seek wise counsel
• Be safe; Set parameters
• Be a wise steward of the time, money, talent your new endeavor will require                                     

Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. (Psalm 37:4)

I did it!  I joined a Christian dating website!  I figured out how to get my picture on all by myself. I normally would ask my tech- savvy kids how to do that..... but I didn't want my kids to freak out because the "Reverend Mother" was joining a Christian dating website......(One of them..who shall remain nameless..... still freaked out.....later!)  :-)

I got lots of "winks" or "nods" or whatever they were called from men....I didn't even respond to those.  I figured, "If you want to say something to me, the say it....be the man!  Start the conversation...don't leave that up to me!"  That was one of my standards I had set.....There's a tip there.....

I got some nice email messages on the site...they were...nice....

Then about 5 days later....I got an email.....that took my breath away.....it was so perfectly written.....for me....guess who it was from?

The Amazing Mr. Brintnall.....His email grabbed my heart.... still I stuck to my guidelines and used my brain....

Follow your heart...whether it has to do with meeting Mr/Mrs Right....or whether it has to do with your next step in achieving your dreams....but don't disconnect your brain....God gave it to you for a reason....

Your God-given dreams will come true!

Until next week.....do something today to fulfill your purpose!

P.S.......If you enjoy my blog, please share it! 

My Odd Life...Comparison is the Death of Joy....

Today......

I've had 2,551 views since October.....Is that good? If so.....then thanks for viewing and sharing!  

If not....then why aren't you sharing this blog?  :-) 

Just kidding....I have no idea if an average of 800 views per month is good or not........ I shall blog on anyway! I know there are at least three of you who look forward to this weekly....so here goes...

People can get discouraged by judging their worth or happiness by the successes of others! They can get stuck in "neutral" because they compare what they are doing to what others are doing, how they are doing it, and when they got it done!

I may think I'm doing great with 2,551 blog views....then one of you will  burst my bubble and inform me that Joyce Meyer has 2 million views per month....Thanks a lot! 
(Disclaimer- I have no idea how many hits Joyce Meyer's nor any other ministry's site gets per month....but I'm sure she gets a WHOLE lot more than 800!)

Can't I just be happy about how far I've come?

Pastors compare sizes of congregations, number of services per week, how many respond for prayer, what kind of building they have.

Traveling ministers compare where they've ministered, how full their calendar is, how many appearances they've had on a Christian TV network.

Credit scores, Job titles, GPAs....

Cars, houses, investments, designer handbags.....

Men compare biceps. Women compare.....well, you know....

Mark Twain said, "Comparison is the death of joy."

Take my odd life, for example....most women my age are celebrating decades of marriage....I've started over again......going on 18 months....(BTW...the honeymoon is NOT OVER YET- WOO-HOO!!) 

Most people my age are getting ready for retirement.....I'm starting to launch my itinerant ministry.

Most people my age have established a "home base" where the grandkids know that GG and Papa live.... you know....where everyone gathers for holiday meals and such......I have moved every 27 months for the past 17 years......I have to remind my mother where I live......

If I compared my life with "most people" I could be discouraged.....but I'm not! I'm excited! I'm joyful! I'm anticipating great things!  My odd life has given me many rich life experiences...not all have been good...but they have all been rich! 

Conversely, there may be some who compare their lives to mine.....and are tempted to think, "Man, she gets all the breaks.....I wish I lived in the sugar cane fields of Southern Louisiana....."  

When I married the AMAZING MR. MICHAEL A. BRINTNALL (after being single for only a little over three years) someone said to me, "WOW. THAT WAS FAST!"  

Maybe for YOU it was fast....but for me.....it wasn't so fast! 

For the Amazing Mr. Brintnall and me...... it was the exact right time!

I was tempted to compare myself to others when we were courting....."What will people think? So- and-so has been single for over a decade, and here I am....considering marrying this man after being single only three years! Will people think I'm in sin?" 

I am extremely happily married to the Amazing Mr. Brintnall because I followed God. I listened to HIS direction. I followed peace. I did get the approval of my spiritual father, but I didn't wait for him to tell me, " Thus saith the Lord, 'This is your husband.'" 

The timing and the way in which I met the Amazing Mr. Brintnall did not fit any of the preconceived notions I had. It did not measure up to any comparisons that had been put in front of me as examples........

How many opportunities have you missed because of comparisons like these?

• No one in my family has ever.......
• The people in my circle of influence only.....
• I heard someone say that you should ALWAYS....
• I've never seen it done that way before.....

God may have something for you to do that no one has ever done before, in a way that no one has ever done it, at a time in life when no one else would dare to do it.

Don't compare your situation with another individual's. You are unique. Your situation is different. You may have jumped through some hurdles that others haven't, but you may also have some advantages that others don't have.

I want to encourage you today to avoid comparison. Do what YOU are supposed to do, the way you are supposed to do it, in the timing that is right for YOU! Here are some tips for moving forward without comparison-

• Seek wise counsel from those who are committed to your success, but don't seek their control.
• Pray. Listen. Follow whatever direction brings peace to your heart.
• When it's time to take that step into what YOU are supposed to do, you will know.
• Don't try to take huge leaps, just take one step at a time and pretty soon you'll see that you've made a leap!
• Get so busy doing and becoming better at what you are supposed to do, that you don't have the time to compare yourself to others.

TODAY.....I began to tell you about how I met the AMAZING MR. BRINTNALL....wait until you hear the rest of the story!

Check in next week. I'll blog more then. Until then, do something today to fulfill your purpose!

AND..... DON'T LET ANYONE KILL YOUR JOY!!!

The blog series, "My Odd Life" will continue next week....it may be time for me to share about how I met the wonderful Mr. Brintnall.....but TODAY.....

I am enjoying reading your posts on FaceBook about putting 2014 behind and having great expectations for 2015........

That's awesome.....but why is the turn of the page on a calendar so special? 

EVERY DAY OF YOUR LIFE can be JANUARY 1 for you..... if you begin every day with a fresh outlook, new hope, stronger determination to do more, be better, work smarter, be more productive, happier, and healthier.....follow the ways of God more fully, listen to His leading more clearly, and do His works more effectively....EVERY SINGLE DAY!

Tonight people will celebrate....some in Times Square....some in restaurants and clubs....some in churches.....What are they celebrating?

They are celebrating HOPE! They lived to see another year.....One of my life's sayings is, "As long as there's life, there's HOPE!"  
My acronym for HOPE is     Having
                                               Only
                                              Positive
                                             Expectations

EXPECT  SOMETHING POSITIVE EVERY DAY....

Think about it....EVERY DAY IS THE DAY IN WHICH EVERYTHING COULD CHANGE!

• That job you've been wanting....you could get the offer.....
• That relationship you've been looking for...could come your way....
• That opportunity you need to get financially set....could be right in front of you....TODAY!

You might be thinking to yourself, "Nothing good ever happens for me.  I've been praying and hoping and looking for an answer to this situation for a very long time.  It's not going to happen."

HOW CAN YOU BE SO SURE?  

You don't know......what you don't know........ 

YOU DON'T KNOW IF

• That next phone call
• That next sales presentation
• That next connection.............................. will be the God-directed answer to your prayers....He DOES answer prayer.......but HE needs us to WALK by FAITH...not sit on our behinds and mope....

The majority of folks get all excited on December 31....but by January 10.....if their life hasn't completely turned around....if the job hasn't materialized, the finances and the jeans are still tight, and the relationship hasn't come around yet....they LOSE THEIR ENTHUSIASM......

Let's look at EVERY DAY AS NEW YEAR'S DAY....Let's not lose our enthusiasm, our drive, our determination, our joy!

How can that be done?????  Life is so.......so.....daily!

How can you keep your expectancy and your enthusiasm throughout the entire year?  
(This would be a great place for me to plug my mini-book, 21 Days to Seal Your Zeal.....but I shall refrain....)

1. Take time to talk to God every morning, and get wisdom from Him by reading the Bible.  If you don't know where to start, I suggest going to the Book of Proverbs and reading one chapter a day...they are short.....but filled with basic "how to succeed" instructions.......All highly successful people have discovered the value of morning meditation and prayer.

2.  Be still and listen.  God speaks to us from the inside.....if we're not quiet, we won't hear Him lead and direct us to those Divine connections.....
    
3. Be thankful. If all you can be thankful for is that you are breathing this morning, then be thankful for that!  Count your blessings....out loud....begin with breathing, then move on to being able to see, speak, walk, etc, etc, etc.....

4. Sing something....anything....but the blues!

5. Write a list of things you will do that day that will move you forward.  It may be as simple as doing the laundry, paying a bill, making a phone call, filling out an application, going out to meet someone new, doing research......

6.  Do the things you wrote on that list.....then cross them off....it is so gratifying and encouraging to cross things off a list!

7. What goes around comes around....or as the Bible says, "You reap what you sow"..... Do something good for someone else......then...Remind yourself of the good things you've done for others in the past....IT WILL COME BACK TO YOU.....but remember...the reaping is always after the sowing!

8.  NOW EXPECT....LOOK FOR IT....like someone who is waiting for guests to arrive at a dinner party.....the house is ready, the dinner is ready.....but you keep looking out the front window for your guests to arrive.....keep looking out the windows of your life......for

ANSWERS, BLESSINGS, NEW CONNECTIONS, NEW DIRECTIONS THAT ARE COMING YOUR WAY!

Not just tomorrow because it's January 1, 2015 on the calendar.....but every day...because EVERY DAY IS NEW YEAR'S DAY FOR THOSE WHO HAVE HOPE!

"This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls....."  Hebrews 6:19

HAPPY NEW YEAR.....EVERY DAY!!!!!!!!

I'll blog ya next week...in the meantime....do something TODAY to fulfill your purpose!

Moving Christmas, Merry Christmas...My Odd Life Part 4

Merry Christmas!

Have you ever had to move during the Christmas season? I have a friend who is packing up now to relocate for her job.... right after Christmas....

I've done this.....3 times..... I think....(I've lost count....which is probably good!)

The first time I did it, my kids were young....I have to admit as a mom, I felt guilty about letting them unwrap gifts one day and the next day putting them in a moving box.....

If you think YOUR holidays are stressful......you shoulda been there for that one!!!!

Up to that point, I had always lived in the same city as my parents (whom I love) and most of my  siblings. We always had Christmas dinner together, we often had Karaoke parties....everyone sang and made fools of themselves.....isn't that what family is for?

I had close friends in the city from which I was moving...... who went Christmas Caroling with us at Nursing Homes, we exchanged gifts, we shared cookies.....and party food....like those little weenies in BBQ sauce.....

Suddenly, I was removed from all of the holiday traditions that I was so familiar with. Even if I could have afforded to buy enough plane tickets to get back to the extended family, the job wouldn't allow time off at Christmas!

SO.....the next Christmas, in the new city, I had to make a decision. Was I going to bemoan the fact that "We were all alone" for Christmas or was I going to find a way to celebrate.....ANYWAY?

I decided I needed to make MY OWN TRADITIONS.  One of them was to get my kids an ornament every year with their name on it....and when they moved out on their own, they would get those ornaments to decorate their own tree.....or houseplant....or cactus......

I still tried to Christmas Carol with a group of people in whatever city I found myself.... some years it worked, some years it didn't..... You've got to have a GROUP to Christmas Carol.....as loudly as I can sing....it just doesn't work alone!

The huge dinners with extended family were pretty much a "thing of the past." I changed my focus and made Christmas dinner a big deal for my kids, and I looked for another lonesome person or family that we could include in our festivities.  I reached out......

What goes around....comes around.... and there were a few years that my daughter and/or I were the "lonesome" persons that families in Texas welcomed as part of their own.....you know who you are....we love you forever!!!

Once again, this year, my husband and I are establishing fresh traditions in our  NEW city....Lafayette, LA!  Caroling anyone?  Still looking for a good gumbo recipe......

Which brings me to the topic of food....what's a holiday without food?  You may be eating tube steaks this Christmas instead of T-bone steaks, but you can make anything a party!  Put those hot dogs on your best plates, light some candles, and put on some Christmas music!


Life is TOO SHORT to bemoan what you DON'T HAVE or CAN'T DO!!!!!

If you will be away from your home town this Christmas, or if your budget is tighter than last year's..... find a way to celebrate....ANYWAY!!!!  Make your own traditions....and open yourself up to share with new friends......

One of my husband's favorite sayings he learned in the Marine Corps is,"Every day's a holiday and every meal's a feast."  

Regardless of where you are this Christmas, how much or how little you have......

Decide to have a merry heart, and you will have a merry Christmas!

He that is of a merry heart hath a continual feast......  Proverbs 15:15

Merry Christmas!  I'll blog ya next week.  Until then, do something today to fulfill your purpose! 

My Very Own Child Called Me "Fake"!!!- My Odd Life- Part 3

Today......  I'm getting personal.....again.....

Just so you're aware.... I am a strong teacher of the Bible...you know....the Greek for this, the Hebrew for that....points 1,2,3,4....all nicely wrapped up at the end with 4 things to do....... (someone please say, "Amen!")....but up to this point, I haven't felt that was the purpose of this blog.....

The purpose of this blog, at least for now, is to share real life stuff....how God has directed, inspired and blessed the footsteps of this girl who has simply tried to live honestly before Him.

Living honestly.............That's a mouthful.....

One of my children (who shall remain nameless) accused me once of being "fake" with people because I would be so positive, friendly, and kind to them....
My own child!!!!  

That offspring of mine knew that I didn't always FEEL like being positive or friendly or kind....

I tried to live this way (positive, friendly, and kind) with my kids as well...but EVERY parent out there will admit there have been times the kids have seen you lose it....(don't look at me in that tone of voice!)

Let's face it...your kids know that you get cranky and tired and...ticked off!

I informed my child that we are expected to ACT the way GOD SAID to ACT whether WE FEEL LIKE IT OR NOT....it was a goal I was working towards...not a perfection I had attained...so cut me some slack, Jack!  :-)

God says, "Be kind."  "Rejoice always."  "Encourage one another with your words."  SO.....that's what I tried to do.....even when I felt like telling people----"Bug off."  "Leave me alone."  "Go away."

My parents' generation was the generation that "held it all in."  They suffered silently.  Stoic.  As a child, I never really knew if my father had a good day or a bad day....I know today, as an adult, that he had PLENTY of very bad days.....but he was always the same towards me.

I never knew about the battle that raged within my mother from the abusive treatment she received as a child.  She ACTED like a good mother....to her eight children...whether she felt like it or not.

Stable.  Strong.  Dependable. They did what they knew was right.  Whether it "felt" good to them or not.

The baby boomers, though....we were taught to "let it all hang out."  Classes at school, Student Government leadership training sessions, church prayer meetings, and even Bible studies became places to "share your feelings."  We were to say what we felt.  What do you "feel this scripture means to you?"  "How do you feel about what she said?"

If we didn't like something, we were told to "Speak up.  Say something about it." Point out when someone is wrong.  Show them the error of their ways.  Be honest about how you feel.

Acting one way, but feeling another was considered hypocritical....one of the worst adjectives that could be attached to an individual, according to my generation.

How many people don't go to church because the church is full of "hypocrites?"  What in the WORLD DOES THAT MEAN?

A hypocrite is one who wears a mask.....yea....so the church has people that wear masks, but your place of work doesn't?  The celebrities you follow...they don't wear masks?  The politicians you admire?  Puh-LEASE!

The church is full of people.....people who are trying to live a life according to God's standards.  When I want to cuss someone out, but God's standards require that I forgive, I have to put on a mask....because I have to ACT a way that I DON'T FEEL LIKE ACTING!!!!

Never in God's directions (AKA "the Bible")  have I read, "So, tell me how you feel about this.....Do you feel like you should love your neighbor?  Do you want to be generous to the poor?  Are you in the mood to rejoice?  Because if you feel like you want to pout and complain and be angry and stingy and mean to people......if THAT'S HOW YOU REALLY FEEL....BY ALL MEANS, GO RIGHT AHEAD.....  

That's not what God's directions say.......

God's Word says, "DO IT."  
Be kind. 
Be compassionate. 
Rejoice.
Speak words that build up and don't tear down. 

So.....
I act joyful when I am sad.
I choose hope when in despair.
I speak words of encouragement when people disappoint.
I give when I want to horde.
I choose to believe the best when it appears that someone has gone out of his/her way to speak ill of me...

I put on the mask of love, patience, joy, and faith, and pretty soon my feelings start to change;  my face begins to take the shape of the mask I was wearing.....

What does, "living honestly' mean?  It means that I am honest before God....I go to Him about my challenges with people and situations and even....my feelings....

And when I deal with people, I try very hard.....to honestly treat them the way God would have me treat them....whether I feel like it or not....but as I told my dear offspring, it's a goal I'm working towards, not a perfection I've attained so...... cut me some slack, Jack! :-)

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.  And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling, and slander, along with every from of malice.  Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.  Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God."  (Ephesians 4: 29-32; 5:1-2)

Would love to hear from you, dear reader........and.....

This week......Celebrate Christmas!  Celebrate Jesus!  Hang some mistletoe and eat a cookie or two.....or three...!!!

I'll blog ya next week.  In the meantime, do something today to fulfill your purpose.

My Odd Life Part 2- Hope

Today......

Are you listening to Christmas music yet?  What's your favorite carol?

My favorite is  Angels We Have Heard on High.......how can you not love a song that uses your first name as the entire chorus? (Glo---o--o--ri---a in excelis Deo....)  :-)

But today I'm thinking about a phrase in the french carol, O Holy Night....  Some of my Lafayette friends can probably sing it in its original french......but in English the phrase is, "A thrill of hope, the weary soul rejoices...."

HOPE is on my heart today.

Christmas can be a tough time for a lot of folks....

You might be struggling with being able to buy your kids gifts this year....my kids had their share of "Dollar Store" Christmases....

You may have had to relocate recently, and this will be your first Christmas without the extended family ......done that.....(just did it AGAIN!)

Maybe one of your loved ones is no longer with you to celebrate this year.....been there....

You may have had some rough Christmases in the past, and the season itself brings painful memories...

Some years ago...... I was given some news....BAD news....just a few days before Christmas......

It was so bad that when it was told to me,  I literally couldn't even sit on the chair....my breath was taken away....I actually slipped out of the chair and onto the floor.  

I can still see the Christmas tree beautifully decorated in the corner of the room, with piles of wrapped gifts underneath, the stockings were hung above the fireplace, Christmas lights lined the house... and in that Normal Rockwell styled scene..... I was on the floor.....

Some people scream, sob, and pound things with their fists..... I just couldn't breathe....or sit in the chair....for some reason....(yeah, I know I'm unique....)  

Maybe this is on my heart to write simply because I am reminded of that every year at this time....or maybe it's because you are going through a similar situation....and God wants you to have that "thrill of hope"so that your "weary soul" can rejoice !

Hope is positive expectation.....whatever bad thing you are facing today....EXPECT that things will get better!

You can choose to think that things will only get worse (be pessimistic)....
 or that they will eventually improve (the optimistic choice)
Choose to have  positive expectations!

You don't know which way this will end up.... so why not expect the best?  

I like to use this acronym for HOPE=    Having
                                                                Only
                                                                Positive
                                                                Expectations

You may ask, "What can I base my hope on?  This situation is hopeless."

True hope, the hope that got me through that dark Christmas, and the days following, was knowing that GOD LOVES ME.

If you know God and have a relationship with Him through Jesus, then your hope is in the fact that GOD LOVES YOU SO MUCH THAT HE SENT JESUS.......if He didn't hold Jesus back from the cross for you, then He will not hold back whatever it is that you need to move forward out this mess........

If you don't know God....I want to let you know that He is the source of true hope.

As the lyrics of O Holy Night describe, when God became incarnate, mankind finally had hope.

Without a relationship with God, you may have some good days.....and you may receive a bounce from some positive mental attitude, but you won't have that "thrill of hope."

Hope that comes from being in a relationship with God will get you through whatever it is you are facing, and whatever you may face in the future...

The need for hope is timeless, and the promise of hope in God is eternal.

Regardless of where you stand today in relationship to God, please take a moment and read this short essay by Charles Spurgeon (1834-1892) on hope....please take a minute a read it...read it out loud if you can....you will be THRILLED with HOPE!


Why yield to gloomy anticipations? Who told thee that the night would never end in day? 

Who told thee that the sea of circumstances would ebb out till there should be nothing left 

but long leagues of the mud of horrible poverty? Who told thee that the winter of thy 

discontent would proceed from frost to frost, from snow, and ice, and hail, to deeper snow, 

and yet more heavy tempest of despair? Knowest thou not that day follows night, that 

flood comes after ebb, that spring and summer succeed winter? HOPE THOU THEN! 

HOPE THOU EVER! For God fails thee not.  Dost thou not know that thy God loves thee in 

the midst of all this?  Mountains, when in darkness hidden, are as real as in day, and God's 

love is as true to thee now as it was in thy brightest moments.  Thous shalt yet climb 

Jacob's ladder with the angels, and behold Him who sits at the top of it--thy covenant 

God.  Thou shalt yet, amidst the splendours of eternity, forget the trials of time, or only 

remember them to bless the God who led thee through them, and wrought thy lasting good 

by  them.  Come, sing in the midst of tribulation,  Rejoice even while passing through the 

furnace.  Make the wilderness to blossom like the rose!  Cause the desert to ring with thine 

exulting joys, for these light afflictions will soon be over, and then "forever with the Lord,"  

bliss shall never wane. - Charles Spurgeon



Back to O Holy Night........"The thrill of hope, the weary soul rejoices, for yonder breaks a new and glorious morn"

The new morning is on its way!  Don't give up!!!!!!

If you want to know more about having a relationship with God that will bring this kind of hope to your life, message me....email me....facebook me....I'd love to talk to you!

I'll blog ya next week.....in the meantime...do something today to fulfill your purpose!

To quote another song....not quite as classical....

"Have a holly jolly Christmas!"